Path to Friendship

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It is post Patty’s memorial. Cox’s make Camp Cox on Lake Hubert, available for a week to unwind for the seven of our nuclear family. They have made their cabin available to us a number of times over the years. What dear friends. I have known Jim and Michele for about sixty years. WOW. They have been there for me in thick and thin - real friends.

David Whyte, writes, in part, in his piece “Friendship”: “But no matter the medicinal virtues [forgiveness, and being there] of being a true friend or sustaining a long, close relationship with another, the ultimate touchstone of friendship is not improvement, neither of the other nor of the self; the ultimate touchstone is witness, the privilege of having been seen by someone and the equal privilege of being granted the sight of the essence of another, to have walked with them and to have believed in them, and sometimes just to have accompanied them for however brief a span, on a journey impossible to accomplish alone.” - fitting words for Jim and Michele.

I am so grateful to have such close enduring friendships.

Path from Nisswa to Camp Cox


PASSING

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It is a few days before Patty’s Memorial on July 30th. Steve and Rosie invite me for a few days of reflection at Rolig Havn, before my final goodbye to my love of fifty-four years and five months. Nature at Rolig Havn is perfect for me to reflect. Even the thousands of swarming flys on the still morning awakening don’t bother. I open my heart and notice what comes. I have three glorious, inspiring sunrises, with nothing but nature to myself. The fifteen pristine acres on the North Shore of Lake Superior is a wonderful setting for the extremely well preserved Edwin Lundie design cabin. It is a wonderful setting, for me, at this moment in time. It is my Contemplating Cove on steroids.

I snap my compact Sony 1500 or so times during the immense immersion, expecting to stitch glimpses of living nature, capturing changing beauty of the moment. Beauty that will trigger memories of present reflections - gratitude, pleasant pasts, growing loves. The water, the waves, the air, the sky, the trees, the quiet, the birds, the fog, the clouds, the still. Nature is so inspiring, so refreshing, so relaxing, so revitalizing. I must have grieved Patty’s loss already. I feel only awe, little, humble, wondering what it must be like, to have passed.

I realize we don’t die. Patty’s body left. Her soul, spirit, essence is someplace good. I know. She was good. She realized her unique goodness. I hope to, too.

PASSING

Grandma

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I wish to share my granddaughter’s eulogy for Patty. It was special. I would like more people to hear her words. I love it.

Hi, my name is Avi and I am Patty’s granddaughter. I just wanted to start off by saying another thank you all for coming here today as we celebrate my grandma. As I am looking out right now I see some unfamiliar faces but knowing you have all come here today tells me everything I need to know, which is that my grandma has made an impact in your life in some way or another. Some of you may have known her as mom, grandma or bama as I should say because I guess i’m the only one that called her grandma, you also may have known her as Mary Praticia, or to the majority of you here today as Patty. I decided I wanted to give this speech just last week. I have never truly experienced grief on this level so I have found myself shutting down, trying to block out the sadness but by doing so I didn’t allow myself to think about all of the good. As today came closer and closer I allowed myself to feel and remember and because the person my grandma was that brought more joy than sadness. Grandma was my best friend, my rock, the person I would always want to go to. My grandma and grandpa moved their whole lives around for me. People have told me how much my grandma didn’t want to be one of those grandparents who only see on holidays and how she wanted to actually be a part of my life and that is exactly what she did. Grandma and Grandpa moved pretty much just up the street from my childhood home and although for a while they were back and forth from Minnesota, my grandma spent a majority of her time in Vermont even when grandpa was back in Minnesota for work. Since my mom and dad are not together whenever it was my dad's week with me and he was out of town for work I would spend it at grandma’s as well as any other times I could because sleepovers at grandmas were my favorite thing. It might seem weird for a kid to see her grandma as her best friend but that is just who my grandma was. It’s rare for a grandparent-grandchild relationship to be so essential and long lasting, but then again grandma was an exceptional person who loved and cared so deeply. She was present in my life in every tangible way and although I saw her as my best friend I also saw her as an additional parent, somebody who I could always count on. I would be thrilled every time I saw her car picking me up from school or anytime my dad told me he had a shoot out of town and I was going to grandmas. During the summers I would spend almost everyday up at her house, spending hours in the pool as she would sit in the lounge chairs and judge my underwater handstands or my water ballet dance which I’m sure looked more like a fish out of water but she would still rate it a 10 out of 10 and when I was lucky she would join me in the pool or just simply sit at the edge, her feet in the water and talk to me about anything and everything. Our routine would then be to go dry off and go to the grocery store where she would get me all the fun treats I would never get at home and we would go home and cozy up in the freezing cold AC where she would tuck me in under the blankets on the couch and we would debate what we would watch, I usually would win and we would end up watching disney channel and she would sit across from me reading. We would go get pedicures, or have spa nights at home where she would then make me a cup of tea and tuck me into her bed, regardless if grandpa was home. Looking back I do feel a little bad we would make grandpa sleep in the guest room. Although she would build a wall of pillows because I guess in my sleep I would try to cuddle up next to her and although she loved me she did not love my freezing cold toes. Although I could go on and on about how great of a grandma she was, I don't want to stand here today and act like I am the only one she cared for on such a deep level. It didn't matter if you weren't her child or even if you were blood, she cared and loved so deeply. I have heard many stories about how she at times acted as a surrogate mother to whoever needed it. That was her nature, protective, compassionate, caring and generous. I am sure many of you here today can remember a time where she took you in, whether that be in a literal sense or not. I urge you all to think about a time where my grandma helped you or was simply there for you. I ask this because I know it has at times been hard for me to not let these past Alzheimer’s filled years impact my memories of her but we all need to remember she was much much more than Alzheimer's. 65 plus years of life so we cannot let these past 10 alter our past memories of her. She would not want to be pitied or treated like less of a person because of this horrible disease. If she were here today she would tell us to celebrate her life and the beautiful time we were able to share with her. Even in these past few years where things got hard we all had to hold on to the little moments. Even towards the end there would be those random moments where she would still call me Avi Mae and even when she didn't recognize me there was a love that never left. Even being with her on her last day, as difficult as it was,  we could all feel the love she felt towards us and how it never left.

Makeup party

Lovely Dance

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Rockland, Maine. I wake at dawn and walk to the water. I see red, then pink, then gold, then yellow, then white - a rising sun - a new day - a beautiful thing.

I see beauty everywhere. I feel calm. I see the boats move slowly, toward each other, away from each other. It is a lovely dance. I reflect - is this a metaphor for my life - a lovely dance? I feel grateful. I am blessed.

The Alzheimer’s years were, albeit a dreadful disease, a lovely dance. Bad days. Good days. Growing. Loving. I learn patience. I feel Patty’s trusting reliance. I love Patty as she loved me. I am an advocate for her, not at the level she was for me, but a valiant effort. I am grateful. I am blessed.

I am inspired to finish Live LOVE, before Patty’s memorial (a reminder for those wishing to attend - St. Joan of Arc - 4537 3rd Ave South, Mpls., MN. 612-823-8205. July 30th 10am visitation. 11am service and lunch)

The text and images of Live LOVE are on MikeSipe.com. Purposeful passions. Priorities. SCG (Self-realizing, Connecting, Giving). Love of self, others. My best thinking, feeling. Living LOVE is a purposeful passion of mine, of the highest priority. I am grateful for feeling love. I am blessed.

Patty had a big influence on my understanding of living love. She quietly lived love in her own effective way. I include Patty in my daily affirmation to ‘Love in the moment’.

Patty, one recent Sunday evening, had a hand in introducing me to the wonderful woman, hospice chaplain, who was sitting in my favorite spot, looking through the wall of windows, at Lake Champlain and the beautiful Adirondack. I was in the sanctuary at All Souls Interfaith Gathering place. I went to sit down at the start of a great service, and there she was, an angel. We talk. We connect. I call Lin, my Angel of death. I drop the death part, mostly, because she makes it easy to live LOVE.

Live LOVE

Lovely Dance Impasto


Roots

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I traveled to Maidstone State Park in Vermont yesterday. Roots, roots, and more roots. Never seen such a scene. I enjoyed the walk in the woods, gingerly stepping over and around exposed roots of birch and cedar. I love it.

I reflect on the day and my roots. Wonderful day with a new special friend - talked a lot about our roots - interesting entanglements, separate realities. I love it.

I feel exposed. I reflect on how it was, how it is. I enjoy the intercourse, the feel of nature and friendship. I love it.

ROOTS

REGENERATION

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My friends are longterm friends - some go back sixty years. I love them. I want more friends - local friends. I’ve resided in Vermont for ten years and have no close friends - friendships that are open, honest, loving.

It’s been just a few months since I started to reach out. The connections I have made with All Souls Interfaith Gathering, Northern Exposure photo group, Gary and Margie are hopeful. I love it. Blessed, for sure.

This image I call REGENERATION connects me to thoughts on where I am in life - soon to be 76, a recent widower of a fifty-four year marriage, at the start of what I call a ten year adventure. Who knows after the great adventure, or even, for that matter, what’s in store tomorrow. Love the moment Mike.

REGENERATION

Light in the fog

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I struggle to simplify my images, have a strong center of interest, and create a feeling that I can experience every viewing. It feels good to find myself saying - yeah - I feel it - It’s coming.

Peaceful and Outline, the images below are on target. I feel there is more to this capture objective that will please me - I don’t know exactly what, but I want to explore.

It is kind of like my life without Patty - I don’t know what will be, but I want to explore.

Peaceful

Outline

Aesthetic Elation

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My photography is transforming. I am less concerned with the technical - the number of pixels, the depth of field, even the resolution. I am now mostly interested in the aesthetic. I want to feel elated with my images. I am attracted to impressionistic filters when I don’t ‘get the feel’ from the image without filtering. Filters help in some cases, for me, with resulting in more painterly images, dream state images, moody images. It’s fun to create a good feel with an image. I am just at the start of this journey.

Sleepy Hallow

Branching Out

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I have really enjoyed branching out a bit since Patty died. I didn’t realize how hungry I am to personally connect with others. Zooming with distant friends and family is good - thank God for great siblings, children, and grandchildren. But there is nothing like connecting with new folks. I have been confined for too long. Patty and I did not make new friends when we moved to Vermont in 2012 - the same year Patty was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. I am not as much a ‘home body’ as I thought, as I’ve been. I feel it now.

I am delightfully surprised on how I enjoy getting out, and reaching out to others.

All Souls Interfaith Gathering (ASIG} has more than met my expectations. All the people I have met are friendly and interesting. Pastors Don and Kim Marie speak my language - they connect with nature, logic, and love. And, what a beautiful environment, overlooking Lake Champlain and the Adirondack. This spiritual interfaith thing is real - is good - brings people together, while celebrating differences. ASIG is small, and given their program and people, they will grow fast, once people catch on to the logic of their love..

I have met potential photo friends with a group called Northern Exposure. (thanks for the introduction Claudia!) I am excited about the possibility of travel photo companionship - something I have never really been able to have and now I can.

For quite some time I have been in the mode of, ‘I can’t do that’… and that was fine with me, because Patty was my first love. Now, I am getting used to saying to myself, ‘ I can do that’. I love it. What’s to come, now that I am branching out?

Branch Out



ABUNDANCE

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The theme at All Souls Interfaith Gathering place this month is Spiritual Abundance.

What a beautiful day to start out the month of May. I walked 17,000 steps this day. I walked Burlington Bay, attended All Souls Interfaith service, and walked Meach Cove. Fortunately, I had along my new extra-strength compact camera, Fuji X-T4, to learn it’s features. Maybe I should have it with me all the time - there always seems to be beauty to capture.

Don and Kim Marie spoke of joy and gratitude we feel from being aware of the abundance of benefits nature provides. The beautiful panoramic view from the chapel overwhelms me - Lake Champlain, Adirondack mountains, sky, spring sprouting. A big contribution to my attendance at ASIG is the view. I love it. I feel aware of my spiritual dimension there.

I started my walk at Meach Cove and quickly saw a sprouting tree, surrounded by dozens of pre-sprouting trees, with a back-drop of the lake, mountains and sky, and I thought that is what I want to capture. I walked around to confirm my belief and before the sun set I captured what I call TreeMountainWaterSky.

TreeMountainWaterSky

By the Sea

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I was looking at one of my many coffee table photo books, By the Sea, by Robert Farber, published in 1987. One of the images caught my attention. I thought, I have an image like that. I’ll pull it up - compare, reflect.

The reflection found me looking at all the images in the book. For each image Farber had a sentence or two, by a famous person, reflecting on what being by the sea meant to them.

Here is a, not-so-famous, person’s sentence or two, to accompany his image, lines. - the look alike, I captured in 2016 in Trieste, Italy, in the canal leading to the Adriatic Sea.

Being by big water quiets, opens, my mind. The sound, smell, majestic view, overwhelms my sense of wonder, particularly when colors of the sky enhance, the pulsating beauty.

LINES

Morning Rush

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Well I did it - I went out to shoot at sunrise. It’s my first, since Patty’s passing. (I never liked the word passing, but now it seems right. Death is so permanent. Passing is going to another place, for awhile.)

Of course, I missed the sunrise. I got to the Williston bridge. I saw the sun rising over Mansfield. I turned around. Found a spot to park, and took Morning Rush. I wanted to get the red, before the blinding white of the ninety million miles away sun.

I was a couple minutes late, especially with fumbling with my new Fugi X-T4 camera and lighter than you can imagine, new carbon fiber tripod.

I took a few images at my contemplating cove during the Golden hour, but none excites.

I contemplate about Morning Rush. I think how nice it is to not have to rush to work - to view the sunrise, to walk the shore, to sit and empty my mind.

I love it.

Morning Rush

Large Canvas Prints Available

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Exhibits of my large canvas images attract viewers and buyers. My website doesn't have the same attraction. I delivered a number of images to a new exhibit site recently and they said my website doesn't do justice to the pieces. I am frustrated - the website reaches so many more people.

Extraordinary Light over my bed adds perspective - bigger is better. Does that help?

I have about forty images on exhibit now in four places. I have another fifteen or so large canvas framed images looking for an exhibit home. Let me know if you have a recommendation. The pieces are on loan and I pay forty percent commission for any sales.

I do custom printing of any of my images on MikeSipe.com and MESipe.com. I am honored to do images for you. My printer is hungry, and threatening to dry up unless I feed it more. This is the time to get major discounts on printing one of my images, or one of yours.

Extraordinary Light

Shades of Gray

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It blows my mind to think about change. And, change is life. I see it all around. Or maybe I should say I only see the obvious. If we put a microscope on everything in nature… and that is everything, you would see constant movement - trees, plants, animals, us.

We don’t see the foot in a year that children grow. We don’t even see the grass grow, but we have to cut it twice a week in June. My Black walnuts grew a foot last year, but I didn’t see it happen.

We know there are seasons. They say four - winter, spring, summer and fall. We can tell when they are here, but we don’t see the daily transformation. Maybe there are 365 seasons a year. Or, for that matter, an infinite amount of transformations.

Change is life - something to embrace. Living is embracing change. The fact that everything is moving - transforming - all the time - is wild, particularly when the human tendency is to keep things the same. Get into our routines. Maybe it’s time for me to question all my routines - embrace new people, new things. I will get into new routines, but be careful Mike, things will change.

I reflect on change when I look at Shades of Gray - the image below. What season is this? Why do I like Black and White in this season? I guess, because the light takes well to my camera, which can capture so many shades of gray. I love it.

Shades of Gray

A World of Thanks

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A Thanksgiving long overdue for the World to contemplate. It is long, for our contemporary fast pace lives, to take the time to read. Slow down to the speed of life, and notice all we have to be thankful.

I am listening to Braiding Sweetgrass. Reference was made to Native Thanksgiving Address. I printed and am compelled to share it.

Haudenosaunee Thanksgiving Address Greetings to the Natural World

The People

Today we have gathered and we see that the cycles of life continue. We have been given the duty to live in balance and harmony with each other and all living things. So now, we bring our minds together as one as we give greetings and thanks to each other as people.

Now our minds are one.

The Earth Mother

We are all thankful to our Mother, the Earth, for she gives us all that we need for life. She supports our feet as we walk about upon her. It gives us joy that she continues to care for us as she has from the beginning of time. To our mother, we send greetings and thanks.

Now our minds are one.

The Waters

We give thanks to all the waters of the world for quenching our thirst and providing us with strength. Water is life. We know its power in many forms- waterfalls and rain, mists and streams, rivers and oceans. With one mind, we send greetings and thanks to the spirit of Water.

Now our minds are one.

The Fish

We turn our minds to the all the Fish life in the water. They were instructed to cleanse and purify the water. They also give themselves to us as food. We are grateful that we can still find pure water. So, we turn now to the Fish and send our greetings and thanks.

Now our minds are one.

The Plants

Now we turn toward the vast fields of Plant life. As far as the eye can see, the Plants grow, working many wonders. They sustain many life forms. With our minds gathered together, we give thanks and look forward to seeing Plant life for many generations to come.

Now our minds are one.

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The Food Plants

With one mind, we turn to honor and thank all the Food Plants we harvest from the garden. Since the beginning of time, the grains, vegetables, beans and berries have helped the people survive. Many other living things draw strength from them too. We gather all the Plant Foods together as one and send them a greeting of thanks.

Now our minds are one.

The Medicine Herbs

Now we turn to all the Medicine herbs of the world. From the beginning they were instructed to take away sickness. They are always waiting and ready to heal us. We are happy there are still among us those special few who remember how to use these plants for healing. With one mind, we send greetings and thanks to the Medicines and to the keepers of the Medicines.

Now our minds are one.

The Animals

We gather our minds together to send greetings and thanks to all the Animal life in the world. They have many things to teach us as people. We are honored by them when they give up their lives so we may use their bodies as food for our people. We see them near our homes and in the deep forests. We are glad they are still here and we hope that it will always be so.

Now our minds are one

The Trees

We now turn our thoughts to the Trees. The Earth has many families of Trees who have their own instructions and uses. Some provide us with shelter and shade, others with fruit, beauty and other useful things. Many people of the world use a Tree as a symbol of peace and strength. With one mind, we greet and thank the Tree life.

Now our minds are one.

The Birds

We put our minds together as one and thank all the Birds who move and fly about over our heads. The Creator gave them beautiful songs. Each day they remind us to enjoy and appreciate life. The Eagle was chosen to be their leader. To all the Birds-from the smallest to the largest-we send our joyful greetings and thanks.

Now our minds are one.

The Four Winds

We are all thankful to the powers we know as the Four Winds. We hear their voices in the moving air as they refresh us and purify the air we breathe. They help us to bring the change of seasons. From the four directions they come, bringing us messages and giving us strength. With one mind, we send our greetings and thanks to the Four Winds.

Now our minds are one.

Haudenosaunee Thanksgiving Address

Greetings to the Natural World

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The Thunderers

Now we turn to the west where our grandfathers, the Thunder Beings, live. With lightning and thundering voices, they bring with them the water that renews life. We are thankful that they keep those evil things made by Okwiseres underground. We bring our minds together as one to send greetings and thanks to our Grandfathers, the Thunderers.

Now our minds are one.

The Sun

We now send greetings and thanks to our eldest Brother, the Sun. Each day without fail he travels the sky from east to west, bringing the light of a new day. He is the source of all the fires of life. With one mind, we send greetings and thanks to our Brother, the Sun.

Now our minds are one.

Grandmother Moon

We put our minds together to give thanks to our oldest Grandmother, the Moon, who lights the night-time sky. She is the leader of woman all over the world, and she governs the movement of the ocean tides. By her changing face we measure time, and it is the Moon who watches over the arrival of children here on Earth. With one mind, we send greetings and thanks to our Grandmother, the Moon.

Now our minds are one.

The Stars

We give thanks to the Stars who are spread across the sky like jewelry. We see them in the night, helping the Moon to light the darkness and bringing dew to the gardens and growing things. When we travel at night, they guide us home. With our minds gathered together as one, we send greetings and thanks to the Stars.

Now our minds are one.

The Enlightened Teachers

We gather our minds to greet and thank the enlightened Teachers who have come to help throughout the ages. When we forget how to live in harmony, they remind us of the way we were instructed to live as people. With one mind, we send greetings and thanks to these caring teachers.

Now our minds are one.

The Creator

Now we turn our thoughts to the Creator, or Great Spirit, and send greetings and thanks for all the gifts of Creation. Everything we need to live a good life is here on this Mother Earth. For all the love that is still around us, we gather our minds together as one and send our choicest words of greetings and thanks to the Creator.

Now our minds are one.

Haudenosaunee Thanksgiving Address

Greetings to the Natural World

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Closing Words

We have now arrived at the place where we end our words. Of all the things we have named, it was not our intention to leave anything out. If something was forgotten, we leave it to each individual to send such greetings and thanks in their own way.

Now our minds are one.

This translation of the Mohawk version of the Haudenosaunee Thanksgiving Address was developed, published in 1993, and provided, courtesy of: Six Nations Indian Museum and the Tracking Project All rights reserved.

Thanksgiving Address: Greetings to the Natural World English version: John Stokes and Kanawahienton (David Benedict, Turtle Clan/Mohawk) Mohawk version: Rokwaho (Dan Thompson, Wolf Clan/Mohawk) Original inspiration: Tekaronianekon (Jake Swamp, Wolf Clan/Mohawk)

Haudenosaunee Thanksgiving Address

Greetings to the Natural World

Over lake we can not see

Printing for Julio Desmont

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I mentioned to James at Art Works framing and gallery that my 44 inch commercial Epson printer needed more usage - I’ve run out of walls and I am not selling fast enough. He referred Julio Desmont www.juliodesmont.com to me. What a treat. - a nice man and a great artist.

Julio has been painting for years. He decided to take the leap of faith and paint full time. I believe it is a good bet. His work is wonderful. His work is a good investment. I bought the print below (20x24) called In Trans for just $250. Prices will be going up because his work is worth it.

If you know anyone who wants custom printing service for less than half commercial costs, give me a call. I am presently not charging for my time custom printing. Ask Julio about my service!

IN TRANS

I didn't know!

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I didn't know that my toughest blow with Alzheimer’s was going to be after Patty succumbed. There is now a big hole in my life. Self imposed restrictions are lifted. I can now photograph at sunrise, take a steam without interruption, come and go as I please, but I don’t feel freed. I feel lost.

We had our daily routines for years - getting ready for the day, listen to fifties, breakfast at Parkside, then Starbucks, walk, news, movie, end of day routines. Patty became my shadow. I would walk to the garage to get wood - Patty would come along. I would go to the Studio for an hour - Patty would come along. She did not feel comfortable enough with any outside care givers to stay alone with them.

When I left Patty to be with an outside care-giver she would wonder to Michael’s and Jessica’s, down the stairs and over to the other side of our multi-generational home. They were there to be with her. They were very instrumental in making Patty’s home stay a possibility. I am grateful. It would have killed Patty, and me, to make a memory care placement. I dreaded the thought.

At first I was concerned about Patty not being able to stay with outside care, then I realized I wanted, and I could, spend more of the final and precious moments with Patty.

Now I am alone, and that is ok. I have really been alone for the last few years. Alzheimer’s prepped me. When I was alone at Kripalu I realized living alone (multi-generational home life helps) would not be a problem for me.

I don’t know about the lost feeling though. I am going to do what I learned from Psychology of Mind - notice the feeling and do nothing. Everything seems to be broken now, including me. It will pass. I know my natural state of mind is a good place. I look forward to new encounters, and treasure the good memories of being with Patty for more than fifty-four years.

Forest Bathing at Kripalu